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Thread: I Have Real Tears Today

  1. #1
    What's Jailbreak? thetoothfairy's Avatar
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    Default I Have Real Tears Today
    Maybe this isn't the place that I should be expressing myself but I needed to do it and felt that there are wonderful people on this forum.... I am sorry and hope I don't get into trouble....

    I stated that I was in the contest but the last couple days I could not take my neck pain anymore.... I went to get a MRI yesterday and this morning the doctor was on the phone with me before 8:00 a.m.

    He stated that I have a herniated disk in my neck and it is really bad and if I even go to fall or slip I could become paralyzed its that serious...

    I have never had so much pain ever.... and was trying to keep going with the contest but just couldn't the last few days... but hopefully I was able to help people out on this forum.... I gave it my best shot! Good thing I have a laptop right now as I can not use my new IMac because of the pain.... its just awful... I can not even look at the monitor right now...

    From burning in my neck, my upper back and when I turn my head my left arm feels paralyzed.... and all kinds of muscles pull... never had something like this before...

    What hurts the most is I have worked sooooooooooooooooo hard to show my little Yorkies and it has taken me a long long time to get the quality that I have.... Since this pain has been so bad with my neck I have started to find new homes for them... I am going to try to keep my very best and hopefully I will be able to show again some day....

    It just breaks my heart to have to let some of them go..... If you only knew what it is like to become a show home... Exhibitor and all of the dedication and love I have for these little guys....

    So I set here right this very minute with tons of work that needs to be done with no help..... don't ask me how I am going to get this done because I don't know... I will just have to go slow at it for now....

    I am not writing this for sympathy... I just needed to vent... I feel like my life is falling apart today...
    Last edited by thetoothfairy; 2008-09-15 at 05:58 PM.

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    Retired Moderator bhz1's Avatar
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    I feel for you. I was in the same situation 7 years ago. I temporarily lost most of the function in my left hand while waiting for surgery.

    Find a good neurosurgeon, not an orthopedic surgeon. Have the surgery. I woke up from surgery and could raise my left arm for teh first time in a few months. I had a titanium plate put on the fusion also no need for long term neck brace. 2 weeks in a hard brace, 2 weeks in a soft collar. Then 4 weeks of physical therapy. Within 3 months I felt nearly 100 %.

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  5. #3
    What's Jailbreak? thetoothfairy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bhz1 View Post
    I feel for you. I was in the same situation 7 years ago. I temporarily lost most of the function in my left hand while waiting for surgery.

    Find a good neurosurgeon, not an orthopedic surgeon. Have the surgery. I woke up from surgery and could raise my left arm for teh first time in a few months. I had a titanium plate put on the fusion also no need for long term neck brace. 2 weeks in a hard brace, 2 weeks in a soft collar. Then 4 weeks of physical therapy. Within 3 months I felt nearly 100 %.
    I am supposed to be leaving soon for Florida and I hope they can get me fixed up.....

    So you had this kind of pain as well? It awful! They called me a bit ago and I am already scheduled to go to a neurosurgeon next week... thank god...

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    Retired Moderator bhz1's Avatar
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    Lets put it this way, it was worse than childbirth initially. The only relief at all was keeping my arm raised over my head. Then as the localized pain in my neck subsided as bit, I got shooting pains down my arm nto my hand. I was given prednisone, vicodin and neurontin. Helped somewhat but i was constantly drugged out which was not a good this as my kids were pretty young and needed me to be able to drive. After the pains, my fingers began to get numb and I lost most of the strength in my wrist.

    After the surgery, I had motion back, much of the numbness was gone although it too close to a year to have 100% normal feeling in my index finger. I had the surgery mid January that year and was well enough to drive on the track by the end of April.

    One of my cats that I had at the time needed sub-cutaneous fluids for kidney failure. Luckily my kids were good helpers.

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    Retired Moderator one1's Avatar
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    You'll be aight girl, best wishes.

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  9. #6
    What's Jailbreak? thetoothfairy's Avatar
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    I know I could be worst off here.... but this is not fun.... and yes I rather go have a baby any day then to go through this....

    BUT I am determined to get down to Florida....

    As for pain medications.... I do not take them as they really mess me up so I am dealing with this head on right now without them.... but I do have them just incase and right now I am about to take some...

    Quote Originally Posted by one1 View Post
    You'll be aight girl, best wishes.
    Thank you one1 for your sweet and kind words....

    Quote Originally Posted by bhz1 View Post
    Lets put it this way, it was worse than childbirth initially. The only relief at all was keeping my arm raised over my head. Then as the localized pain in my neck subsided as bit, I got shooting pains down my arm nto my hand. I was given prednisone, vicodin and neurontin. Helped somewhat but i was constantly drugged out which was not a good this as my kids were pretty young and needed me to be able to drive. After the pains, my fingers began to get numb and I lost most of the strength in my wrist.

    After the surgery, I had motion back, much of the numbness was gone although it too close to a year to have 100% normal feeling in my index finger. I had the surgery mid January that year and was well enough to drive on the track by the end of April.

    One of my cats that I had at the time needed sub-cutaneous fluids for kidney failure. Luckily my kids were good helpers.
    I want to thank you also for being so kind and understanding...
    Last edited by thetoothfairy; 2008-09-15 at 10:29 PM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost

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    Retired Moderator bhz1's Avatar
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    I mostly took the pain meds at night so i could sleep. Its amazing how much better i was able to face it when I was rested.

    A trip to Florida will be good for you. Fun can outweigh pain anytime. I broke 2 toes on my right foot about a month ago, the big toe and the one next to it when I dropped a sliding glass shower door on t. A week later I somehow stuffed my foot into a Van's sneaker from one of my son's and was able to drive at a track event despite being hardly able to walk. It did not bother me when I was driving. I still cant wear normal shoes or walk quite correctly. In fact I need to get up from this chair and go lie down since my foot still swells up.
    Last edited by bhz1; 2008-09-16 at 06:53 AM.

  11. #8
    I cant imagine....but I can say best wishes.

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    What's Jailbreak? thetoothfairy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bhz1 View Post
    I mostly took the pain meds at night so i could sleep. Its amazing how much better i was able to face it when I was rested.

    A trip to Florida will be good for you. Fun can outweigh pain anytime. I broke 2 toes on my right foot about a month ago, the big toe and the one next to it when I dropped a sliding glass shower door on t. A week later I somehow stuffed my foot into a Van's sneaker from one of my son's and was able to drive at a track event despite being hardly able to walk. It did not bother me when I was driving. I still cant wear normal shoes or walk quite correctly. In fact I need to get up from this chair and go lie down since my foot still swells up.
    Yes that is what I am doing right now is taking the pain meds at night... but it is hard to get around during the day.... right now I can hardly turn my head or walk..... I had all I could do to take care of my little doggies today...

    The pain is so bad you about want to blow your brains out.... I have never felt so much pain in my life! I can handle pain but this is in a world of its own... probably because it is all connected to your spine?

    All I want is for it to all go away..... I am hoping they can put me back together and get me back on my feet so I can get the heck out of Michigan soon.... I just hope I don't have problems of any sort if I can get down to Florida because I will be all alone with the rest of my dogs that I am keeping.....

    And if I do.. oh well... I am a big girl and can handle what ever comes my way just like I am right now...

    Quote Originally Posted by cpjr View Post
    I cant imagine....but I can say best wishes.
    Thank you cpjr...

    What a nice bunch of people that have commented and trying to understand.... I am grateful....
    Last edited by thetoothfairy; 2008-09-16 at 11:57 PM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost

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    you will get better!
    I feel you on taking the pain meds. When I passed my last kidney stone last month, I was taking something for pain. It made me vomit a lot. So I took more meds for the vomiting. Then all those meds made me constipated.
    I ended up just dealing with the pain and not take any meds. The side effects from the meds seemed worse than the actual pain!

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    Retired Moderator DoerrFan's Avatar
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    Feel better, im sure things will improve.

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    Livin the iPhone Life sziklassy's Avatar
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    Take things one day at a time. A dog lover myself, I am sorry to hear you have to part with some of your best friends. I am sure you will find great homes for them! They see your pain and will understand having to go to a new home. Hopefully you will still get to see them,
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  20. #13
    What's Jailbreak? thetoothfairy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pncntigger View Post
    you will get better!
    I feel you on taking the pain meds. When I passed my last kidney stone last month, I was taking something for pain. It made me vomit a lot. So I took more meds for the vomiting. Then all those meds made me constipated.
    I ended up just dealing with the pain and not take any meds. The side effects from the meds seemed worse than the actual pain!
    Thank you also... I could never be a dope freak..... I can't function when I take these drugs.... and I have to be able to do that at least mentally right now.... and I get some of the symptoms you get when I take them but I have to so I can keep going for my dogs..... its really something what you will put yourself through for doggies...

    Quote Originally Posted by DoerrFan View Post
    Feel better, im sure things will improve.
    Thank you also..... I will surely let you guys know what they are going to do with me when I go to the doctors next week....

    Quote Originally Posted by sziklassy View Post
    Take things one day at a time. A dog lover myself, I am sorry to hear you have to part with some of your best friends. I am sure you will find great homes for them! They see your pain and will understand having to go to a new home. Hopefully you will still get to see them,
    So far I have found wonderful homes for them.... as you know a show home and exhibitor has more than one dog.... I will not part with my Champions and their babies that I have grown up.... but the dogs that are getting older must go so that I can get my numbers down a bit....

    This was always my most fear.... having something like this happen and having to slow up a bit... it is all of us show homes fears.... it takes years and years to do what I am doing and we earned the privilege to breed and show....

    I want to thank you so very much for the kind words as well... I have hit the thanks button for each of you as well... and I will continue to do so for anyone that comments to this thread when I can try to set long enough to type...
    Last edited by thetoothfairy; 2008-09-17 at 04:55 AM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost

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    Retired Moderator one1's Avatar
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    I have an illness that I have to deal with everyday which I explained here: http://www.modmyi.com/forums/chit-ch...ght-smell.html

    Seems like the older you get, the more crap you deal with.

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    What's Jailbreak? thetoothfairy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by one1 View Post
    I have an illness that I have to deal with everyday which I explained here: http://www.modmyi.com/forums/chit-ch...ght-smell.html

    Seems like the older you get, the more crap you deal with.
    You don't seem like your very old to me... but yes... it appears you have to deal with a lot of crap at my age... I never said anything about my desease I have had to learn to live with... that is why I go to Florida during the winter time because I have to much pain to stay in Michigan..... in the summer I am better.... my body burns all over the place as if I have a bad sunburn, road rash or carpet burns.... but I have found ways to live without drugs... I live in warm climates all of the time...

    That is why I am starting to freak as I got to get out of here soon or I will really be in touch shape.....

    And then in May I had a heart cath done and I am not lucky there either.... that is why I stated I feel like my life is falling apart...

    BUT at least I have my iPhones and Mac's and little doggies!

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    Retired Moderator bhz1's Avatar
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    We truly need all our senses to "live". I was told I should use earplus when I drive the race car. I can't! It affects my driving. I need to hear the engine loud or not.

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    iPhone? More like MyPhone
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    Wow I hope things work out in the end for you and you get better, I cant even imagine how tough and cruel life must seem at the moment.

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  27. #18
    What's Jailbreak? thetoothfairy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaloyan View Post
    Wow I hope things work out in the end for you and you get better, I cant even imagine how tough and cruel life must seem at the moment.
    Thanks so much.... life is pretty tough right now at times I feel like I am going to go out of my mind because of the pain..... I only have two more days to wait to see the surgeon.... I was lucky to get in to see the surgeon in a week but it has been a long long week...

    I did get the reports back and this is what they said....

    There is moderate degenerative change of the cervical spind mostly effecting C5-C6 and C6-C7.

    At C4-C5 level there is a small central osteophyte formation wiht mild effacement of the CSF space.

    There is mild degenerative spinal stenosis noted at C5-C6 level due to small posterior osteophyte. In addition there is mild right neural foraminal stenosis due to uncinate process hypertrophy.

    There is a large left paracentral C6-C7 herniated nucleus pulposus causing moderate spinal process. There is also severe left neural foraminal stenosis.

    There is severe spinal stenosis at C6-C7 level due to a large left paracentral herinated nucleus pulposus. In addition there is severe left neutral foraminal stenosis.

    Minimal degenerative spinal stenosis at C5-C6 level with mild right neural foraminal stenosis.

    A small central posterior osteophyte is seen at C3-C4 level with mild effacement of the CSF space.

    I was told what this means is at C5-C6 I have some bone spurs that will have to be taken off and C6-C7 is the herniated disk and the stenosis that is severe with it means that my bones have almost collapsed and if they do and hit my spinal nerves this is what could make me go paralyzed.

    I will keep you all posted once Tuesday gets here when I go to the doctor...

    Thanks for your caring and kind comments.

  28. #19
    What's Jailbreak? thetoothfairy's Avatar
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    Checking in to let you guys know that I have to have surgery on Friday... I went to the surgeon today and it is so bad that he wanted to do the surgery tomorrow but all of his spots were taken already.... so I am getting it fixed on Friday....

    I have to have the disks removed and a cage put in my deck once they remove the bad disks....

    Hopefully it won't take long before I get back on my feet and feel much better....

  29. #20
    Retired Moderator bhz1's Avatar
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    seems like you got a thorough diagnosis. I had my disc between c6 and c7 removed and the vertebra fused ad plated. I luckily didn't have the degeneration or the stenosis.
    I'm glad you are having the surgery this soon. I'll be thinking positive thoughts for you.

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