Scared about restoring, but have mobile sync

[theantony]

Hi. A while ago itunes couldn't see my phone, it said my iphone can't be read you must restore. Paranoid about loosing everything I jailbroke it backed up my shsh with cydia and copied data to hd via ssh. I copied my contacts on a trial mobile me account and I also have a recent mobile sync folder on my desktop. I deleted my contacts stupidly by mistake when I deleted my mobile me account but I prosume there in the mobile sync folder.
When I click alt restore in itunes to search for a back up in the mobile sync folder it can't see anything to back up. So. Do I restore my phone in itunes which will take me to 4.1 (I am on 3.1.3) and be able to restore my phone with the mobile sync folder to get my contacts back. Jailbreak and shsh my other data back.
If anyone can help me with noob help on this. I have googled it like mad but still not sure on the best way to go......

I am on mac and pc

Cheers...

Any help....please...

An update. I found a thread about deleting the itunesdb file and all files in that folder. It worked I have now got past the "I tunes can't read your phone" stage but I only see the summery tab. I can restore as new phone or as a back up ( I have an old one thats it except my mobile sync folder) but I can't control click on the phone icon in itunes to create a back up know. Any way round this....