+ Reply
Results 1 to 9 of 9

Your favorite Apple, iPhone, iPad, iOS, Jailbreak, and Cydia site.


Thread: APPLE TO FIX MALFUNCTIONING iPAD CUSTOMERS

is a discussion within the

General iPad Chat

forums, a part of the

General iPad

section;
MALFUNCTIONING iPad customers are to be 'fixed' , Apple confirmed last night. The release of the game-changing screen with buttons earlier this week saw Apple shops flooded with thousands of
...
  1. #1
    What's Jailbreak? iDom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    20
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Talking APPLE TO FIX MALFUNCTIONING iPAD CUSTOMERS
    MALFUNCTIONING iPad customers are to be 'fixed', Apple confirmed last night.

    The release of the game-changing screen with buttons earlier this week saw Apple shops flooded with thousands of over-excited, middle-aged media professionals looking slightly odd in their Converse baseball shoes.

    However the company has admitted that many iPad buyers have experienced a mental bug which has caused them to question whether the machine works as perfectly as it obviously does.

    Apple is now offering an offline 'fix' for the problem where owners hand themselves in for psychological reconditioning and massive electric shocks.

    A spokesman said: "It's a simple mental readjustment to make users more compatible with their iPads.

    "Through a combination of shouting and targeted electricity we are able to erase the creeping sense that they've been duped by their own pathetic desire to be cool into buying something that doesn't really work."

    He added: "Clearly there can be nothing wrong with the iPad. Like all Apple products it is terrifyingly perfect, like something beamed back from a future time where everything is brilliant white and humans have evolved into beautiful androgynous beings in shiny jumpsuits who don't do poos."

    Reconditioned iPad owner Tom Logan said: "My iPad works perfectly, it's simply that the rest of the universe, specifically the internet and my hotmail, has yet to fall into sync with its utter perfection.

    "And before you ask, it is the ideal size and will fit perfectly into my eight-inch trouser pocket, just as soon as the imperfect universe sees fit to create such a perfect garment."

    ( via The Daily Mash - APPLE TO FIX MALFUNCTIONING iPAD CUSTOMERS )
    One’s never alone with a rubber duck.

  2. #2
    Master Modder wim66's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Netherlands
    Posts
    2,974
    Thanks
    3,411
    Thanked 8,186 Times in 2,088 Posts

    lmao

  3. #3
    Green Apple jadenyuki678's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    35
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    lmafo

  4. #4
    Green Apple Azlum's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Limington, ME
    Posts
    54
    Thanks
    14
    Thanked 5 Times in 4 Posts

    *yawn*

    I have nothing against hilarious Apple bashing... but this just isn't funny. Dry and stupid, sure. Funny? Nah.

  5. #5
    What's Jailbreak? iDom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    20
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Quote Originally Posted by Azlum View Post
    *yawn*

    I have nothing against hilarious Apple bashing... but this just isn't funny. Dry and stupid, sure. Funny? Nah.
    WoW dude! Excuseeeez-moi! lol Where is your Nobel prize! You sure show off immaculate brightness here, huh?
    How about avoiding taking yourself so seriously and start enjoying life a little, hmm? You might not sound so cult member then. Might help.
    One’s never alone with a rubber duck.

  6. #6
    EffenTroll ! Effenpig!'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    In a house
    Posts
    1,057
    Thanks
    18
    Thanked 57 Times in 50 Posts

    Do ya think apple can fix my butt? It's itchy and makes squeaky noises

  7. #7
    apatia z3r01's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Brooklyn
    Posts
    5,698
    Thanks
    82
    Thanked 886 Times in 557 Posts

    reading this felt like eating sand.....not very pleasurable
    [IMG]http://img829.imageshack.us/img829/9703/modu.gif[/IMG]

  8. #8
    Green Apple Azlum's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Limington, ME
    Posts
    54
    Thanks
    14
    Thanked 5 Times in 4 Posts

    Quote Originally Posted by iDom View Post
    WoW dude! Excuseeeez-moi! lol Where is your Nobel prize! You sure show off immaculate brightness here, huh?
    How about avoiding taking yourself so seriously and start enjoying life a little, hmm? You might not sound so cult member then. Might help.
    Don't blame me just because it's not funny

  9. #9
    iPhoneaholic iphone8130hak's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Washington DC
    Posts
    362
    Thanks
    6
    Thanked 36 Times in 33 Posts

    Haha lmao
    Keithsta

Posting Permissions
  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts